Gift of Relationships

Our Current series at The Merge on Sunday nights is "The Proposal." This month we are looking at what scripture tells us about dating and relationships. As I have been studying and preparing for these talks I continue to realize how much God teaches you through your relationships, even after you are married! This week we will be discussing the priorities in the dating relationship, and believe me these carry over into the married life as well.

Our goal in this series is to equip you in setting priorities and boundaries that will deepen the spiritual part of your dating life. Here are a few reasons for having priorities in dating.

First, each individual involved in a relationship should have a growing and thriving relationship with the creator, Jesus (Colossians 1:15-18)! The whole point of dating is to get to know the person and identify qualities and characteristics you desire in a future mate. If God isn't first in your life, and if you aren't in a growing relationship with Him, your other relationships will struggle. That goes beyond dating and into the realm of your home and school life as well. Are you having problems in your relationships? If you answered yes, then I would say you are having problems connecting with God on any sort of normal routine. When God is your priority everything else comes second.

Second, priorities help you realize that the issue isn't how to fit your spiritual life into your dating life; rather, it is how does my dating life fit in with my LIFE (spiritual). Dating should always be interpreted through our relationship with God and through His Word. God doesn't change standards. God has an opinion on how we should date, who we should date and He has a clear guideline in what you are to look for in a mate and what you are to avoid. This is for your protection not for you pain. God tells us not to be "unequally yoked" with non believers. This is not because He hates nonbelievers. On the contrary He loves them just as much as He loves you (John 3:16; I Peter 3:18), but He knows that problems arise in a relationship when there is disagreement, especially in beliefs.

Third, priorities help you appreciate and see the value of the gift God gives you when you marry. Lookat Genesis 2:20-25, God didn't give Eve to Adam till after Adam realized there was no one suitable for him. In other words when man realized that he was alone, he also realized his value in his relationship with God. God's plan wasn't to squander a gift on someone who would be unappreciative; rather, God waits till Adam is prepared to appreciate the gift of Eve. I believe that God will provide the person He has for you when you are prepared to appreciate the gift wholeheartedly.

So are you struggling with dating during your teenage years? Have you tried focusing all your attention and passion towards Christ. Let Him teach you to follow Him daily, longing after His will and desires. I guarantee that God will not disappoint you in who He has specifically for you. It will be beyond your wildest dreams, and you will appreciate it even more because you will realize the value of the gift from God.